Four Hilarious Actors Does Not A Comedy Classic Make

Before I get my head bitten off about how much money Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle is making, I just need to let you all know that I don’t think that matters because I think the movie itself is not going to stand the test of time. That’s what I mean when I say it’s not going to be the comedy classic it seems like it should be with its cast, I just don’t think it has that kind of legs.

This review is a little late because I needed some time to think about it, not because it’s a particularly thought provoking film but because I needed to make sure I wasn’t being too harsh on it. It’s not bad. It’s fine. But I think that makes it worse. You have four hilarious people in this film, giving it their all and they have chemistry, great chemistry, even Nick Jonas did a fantastic job but there’s just something missing from the film and I think it’s plot or like heart or something? I can’t quite put my finger on it so I’ve avoided writing a review because it’s just me saying something is wrong with the movie but not being able to back it up. However, I feel like I have a duty now to tell you my thoughts on stuff I see so I’m going to try and analyse Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle.

The first aspect of the film I want to take a stab at is the music. This film’s musical vocabulary frustrated me. The only use of a musical language in the film really is the classic Jumanji drums every a new thing is going to happen and I get it, it’s nostalgic but it’s also lazy considering the rest of the soundtrack is the most boring thing you’ve ever heard, it’s just so generic. The film is called Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle, they play Welcome to the Jungle by Guns ‘n’ Roses in the trailer and play it only once in the film, that’s during the credits as well so it doesn’t even actually play in the film. That song would’ve been the perfect theme for the film and would’ve scored the action so well. The lack of a musical identity in the film is very disappointing considering the chance they had to do something interesting. Even if they had used the same instrumentation of that song for the soundtrack and not necessarily the song, that would’ve been enough. The movie feels like electric guitars and drum kits but has the most bland orchestral score.

Technically the film doesn’t stand out, the visual effects are average, they could be from any 2017 blockbuster. The cinematography did nothing for me, even for a blockbuster it’s dull. There are shots of locations in the film that are obviously meant to wow the audience but they just didn’t, the shot choices were boring throughout.

In terms of plot, I think there isn’t much they could’ve done about it. The original Jumanji lacks plot too so what could they really do when making a sequel? It wouldn’t be Jumanji if it was stuffed with story but that doesn’t make it any less of a problem. The villain is worse than any Marvel villain, the most uninteresting antagonist I’ve seen in a long time, he could’ve been removed from the film and it wouldn’t have mattered. The world that they’ve built doesn’t feel new at all or particularly creative or even that fun and that’s a real shame considering the potential for creative world building with such a concept as this.

What saved this movie from being genuinely bad is the cast. They’re pretty fantastic if I’m honest. There were moments that I forgot how mediocre the rest of the movie was because of the performances. The Rock is the most charismatic man you will ever see on screen in this day and age, he rivals a young Harrison Ford with his magnetic energy, he knows not to take himself too seriously and performs in this brilliantly tongue-in-cheek way that is very funny. Jack Black is someone who needs to be in more films, he does an amazing job at playing a beauty obsessed teen trapped in the body of an overweight, middle aged man. Black’s chemistry with co-star Karen Gillan, who herself perfectly balances badass and geeky, was great, especially in what was my favourite scene in the film, in which Black had to teach Gillan how to be sexy, a simple comedic premise but executed very well. Kevin Hart was just Kevin Hart so if you like Kevin Hart then you’ll like him in this too. I’m not a huge fan but I appreciated his chemistry with Dwayne Johnson.

Oddly, the surprise star performance came from Nick Jonas who managed to hit all of his comedy beats and dramatic beats with unlikely precision. I’d be interested to see what he could do in a better comedy or even in a dramatic role.

Overall, this movie was rather disappointing, especially with the hype it got. It’s fun but forgettable and ultimately left me dissatisfied. Everything but the cast was subpar but if you need something to take your kids to it’s not the worst although I’d recommend you just watch Paddington 2 instead. I’d say this goose probably doesn’t have many teeth.